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Random Joke
A missionary who had spent years showing a tribe of natives how to farm and build things to be self-sufficient gets the word that he is to return home.

He realizes that the one thing he never taught the natives was how to speak English, so he takes the chief and starts walking in the forest. He points to a tree and says to the chief, "That is a tree." The chief looks at the tree and grunts, "That tree."

The missionary is pleased with the response.

They walk a little farther and the padre points to a rock and says, "This is a rock." Hearing this, the chief looks and grunts, "This rock." The padre is really getting enthusiastic about the results when he hears a rustling in the bushes.

As he peeks over the top, he sees a couple making out behind the bush.

The padre is really flustered and quickly responds, "Riding a bike."

The chief looks at the couple briefly, pulls out his blow gun and kills them.

The padre goes ballistic and yells at the chief that he has spent years teaching the tribe how to be civilized and kind to each other, so how could he just kill these people in cold blood that way?

The chief grunts, "My bike."
 

Jigsaw Puzzle
Filed under Blonde jokes with 1553 views

Jill gets a distressed phone call from her very blonde friend Buffy.

"I've got a problem," says Buffy.

"What's the matter?" asks Jill.

"Well, I bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges."

"What's the picture of?" asks Jill.

"It's of a big rooster," replies Buffy.

"All right," says Jill. "Lets check it when I am at your place this evening."

So later she goes over to Buffy's house and she leads Jill into her kitchen and shows her the jigsaw puzzle on the kitchen table.

Jill looks at the puzzle and then turns to her and says, "For heaven's sake, Buffy, put the cornflakes back in the box."
 
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Cheating Spouse
Filed under Relationship jokes with 1583 views

One day God came down and said to three guys that the less you cheat on your wives the better the cars you'll get in heaven. So the first guy went to heaven after cheating on his wife 67 times and he got a Mercedes.

The second guy went to heaven and had cheated on his wife 2 times and he got a Ferrari, then the third guy went to heaven and said that he had never cheated on his wife and he got a Bentley.

Then one day the third guy was all sad and depressed and his friends asked him what was wrong and the third guy said, "I saw my wife the other day", he let out a sigh " she was riding a skateboard"
 
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